It's all about the connections

I recently went to a cupcake place in downtown Wilmette, IL to apply for a summer job. I went in, asked about the available positions, picked up an application and left. That night, my mom mentioned to a family friend that I was applying there, and he immediately responded by sharing that they are really good friends with the owners. I found out later that our family friends texted the owners of the shop and gave me a good recommendation, without me asking or knowing. The next day, when I dropped off my application, the owner sat me down and told me that it bothered him that I didn't have any previous work experience, but since my family friends gave me such a good recommendation it didn't matter. I was hired within five minutes. I was shocked at the speed of the process. This reminded me of my previous blog post, where I talked about how college is mostly about making connections, those that will end up helping you later in life. I suppose that connections can also be made through family. It is interesting that you seem to need all of these different types of connections to be successful in the U.S., although we always seem to think that we can make it on our own. It is definitely harder for a student from a family with no college graduates to make it than someone from a family with a legacy.

Where did you go to school?

A question that constantly surfaces within the first few minutes of conversation in current American culture and in The Great Gatsby is that of where one went to college. We very easily can guess things like one's class, economic background and/or current social status by asking this question. Depending on the interrogator, this in turn could perhaps lead to any of the types of classism that we discussed in class.  

Not just ANY education, but that of a prestigious education is of extreme importance in The Great Gatsby. We see this trend from the very beginning of the book, as Nick manages to say that he himself attended Yale (Fitzgerald, 3) within the first three pages. Tom attended Yale University as well (Fitzgerald, 5).  At the first party hosted by Gatsby and attended by Nick, Nick makes a point in noting that Jordan Baker's "escort" is "a persistent undergraduate" (Fitzgerald, 44).  Only the wealthy could attend college, especially the prestigious colleges that are continuously mentioned throughout the GG.  I think that human capital, in this case education, goes hand in hand with social capital. Often times, the men in the book built connections off of where they attended university. It is like this in current society as well. Some will argue that if education was the only thing taken into consideration, it wouldn't really matter where you went to college. Everyone is taught English, chemistry and business nearly the same way, no matter where you go.  The difference is the connections. The "better" or more prestigious college that you go to, the easier it is for you to get a job, and many times it is just because of the name. It is almost if each college in the United States is its own little secret society. You must be accepted by them, and no matter how hard you try to get in, or how qualified you are, they can always say no. You also meet people in college that might be fellow coworkers or bosses one day. Obviously education is something that Americans value very much, but it seems like there are hidden motives as well.    

The Beauty Queen$

Girls who participate in child beauty pageants are more often harmed by the experience than helped. Many suffer from low self esteem and/or eating disorders because they simply do not know their own value. If one has been participating in beauty pageants since she was a toddler, her parents basically have been telling her for years that she was never good enough.  She wasn't pretty enough without makeup, so they caked it on.  She wasn't popular or well liked enough, so they made her into a stage act. You can only imagine what this does to the mind. Just think about the culture between the competitors, little girls are judging each other based on their appearances, based on a skewed and unhealthy standard of beauty.  Photographer Zed Nelson said, "When everybody around you has had their breasts enlarged, their teeth whitened and their skin peeled, then you become the odd one out, you become the freak". These girls very quickly learn what it takes to win, be noticed and be appreciated in our society.

Later, the participants are displayed to the world, and American females quickly learn what will get them noticed, that is whatever the girls on TV are wearing/doing. It is not surprising that these values that are being instilled in girls are for economical purposes, and in this case, they are fueling the beauty industry. By telling girls that they aren't pretty enough or skinny enough, the beauty industry can make thousands of products that will "fix" their problems. Women who are unsatisfied with their bodies make excellent target costumers. We all want that "luscious beach hair", the "silky smooth legs", the "voluminous mascara" or the "seductive perfume".

It is sad that the American beauty industry is set up in a way that takes advantage of women's flaws in order to make money. In my mind, the harm that is being done psychologically outweighs the potential good that could come from beauty pageants.

What happened to childhood?

Many have questioned my topic for Junior Theme, because it doesn't seem like a relevant problem in American society. But it is.

Child beauty pageants are disgusting. In my eyes, it is almost a form of child abuse. Little girls, babies, put on a facade to entertain adults. They wear an unrealistic amount of makeup, get their hair done, wear fake teeth, fake eyelashes, padded bras, high heels and put on a show in order to be broadcasted on television.  They are sexualized at the age of toddlers, dressed to look like women, and are taught to dance provocatively for the world. It's disgusting. As portrayed by the "before" and "after" images provided, the changes that one must undergo to look like this are very dramatic. The image on the right side, doesn't even look like a real girl.  It looks like a cartoon character, or a barbie doll. 

Not only are the girls participating harmed by the experience of beauty pageants, but the viewers are as well. These television shows teach young American girls that they are only valued for their looks, and that they have to look/act in a provocative, sexual way in order to get attention from others. According to USA Today, "Glitz pageants are a multibillion-dollar business, having exploded since Toddlers & Tiaras came on in 2009". Because so many Americans are viewing shows like Toddlers & Tiaras, the demand for child beauty pageants has skyrocketed.

The window that we are giving to children to grow and develop is becoming smaller and smaller.  The media and society expects girls to be dolls that are put on display, and by making them into "women" so soon, they are not given a childhood. 

What's on Your Bumper?

During dinner tonight, I had an interesting conversation with our Norwegian exchange student about bumper stickers. She was commenting on how her NT soccer team was selling car magnets, and that in Norway NO ONE has bumper stickers or anything of that sort on their cars. America, on the other hand, is a different story. Here, it is almost rare to see a car without a bumper sticker. This made me wonder about why we use bumper stickers and what American values the use of them portrays. The messages on bumper stickers vary immensly, as it can range from supporting your kid's sports team, to expressing political or religious views, to supporting US troops or even breast cancer. These stickers are a way for people to express their opinions to the world without any consequences. The person behind you at a stoplight reads your thought provoking sticker, and goes on with his/her day without having a chance to talk to you about it. It is almost like a one way conversation with the world. Bumper stickers are a window through which random people that you might not ever meet can categorize you and learn something about you.

On my family's car, we have a New Trier sticker, which informs everyone that we live in the New Trier district, and probably like our school. From knowing the location of New Trier, people probably could guess that we are a middle to upper class family. We also have a Depauw University sticker, which tells the world that someone in the family has a college education and is proud of their school. There is a New Trier track and field sticker, which suggests that we value sports and physical activity in our family. The most interesting sticker on our car is an AFS (American Field Service) sticker that says "Changing lives, sharing cultures". This shows that my family values international experiences, and maybe has hosted exchange students or been exchange students in the past. The idea of bumper stickers supports the American values of individuality, freedom of speech and expression, and superiority. By having different personal values on the back of your car, you are making yourself known to the world, showing that you are a unique individual. Obviously you see bumper stickers of all sorts,  and some might be offensive or criticizing, but we have the right to express ourselves. I think the most important value that bumper stickers showcase is that of superiority/I'm-better-than-my-neighbor. Bumper stickers are kind of a way to brag and promote things that you are involved in. What do you think is so American about bumper stickers? What kind of bumper stickers does your family have on their cars? What does this reveal about your family?

Unexpected?

The other day I was listening to Pandora and a very strange advertisement (on right) popped up on my screen. Pictured was a pregnant man, and the caption read, "Unexpected? Protect yourself and your partner. Avoid unplanned pregnancies and STIs. Use condoms." It is obvious that we are making progress in that our generation is the least homophobic generation that America has had, but I think that this ad is taking it to an extreme. This is simply uncalled for. This is not an attractive advertisement to me, and actually I find it quite sexist and racist. Everything about this advertisement is "unexpected". For biological reasons, it is simply impossible for a man to become pregnant. He also looks extremely sad and ashamed, which I find degrading to women. I think that pregnancy is a beautiful thing, and this ad makes it seem disgusting and something that is unwanted. He has lost all hope, because his life is now ruined thanks to this unexpected occurrence.

It is also interesting that the man is of color. The advertisement proposes that this sort of thing would only happen to a minority, maybe suggesting that they are not as educated in this topic. This makes me wonder who the target audience of this ad is. Is it targeted towards minorities? Maybe African-Americans and/or gay people? What do you think about this sort of advertisement? Is it too much?

"Only in America"

As I was browsing through the articles under the US tab on The Week website, I noticed that there was a new sort of series called "Only in America". It is set up in a flipbook style, and there are hundreds of short stories that feature different Americans who did something that apparently only an American would do. 


After flipping through several articles, I noticed that almost all of them showed outrageous things that Americans would do, which shed a bad light on certain American laws, policies and culture. For example, the first one is titled, "Suing the people who saved your life". It briefly talks about a man in Colorado who is suing the people who rescued him from a flood, just because he thinks that they didn't rescue him fast enough. The man (Roy Ortiz) shockingly said, "I'm really happy to be alive, but I'm looking for some help in paying my bills." Only in America would someone take advantage of the justice system to basically steal money from the people who saved his life.





Some of the stories are much more severe, as the next one that caught my eye was "Throw a snowball, get arrested". This one is about a 13 year old kid who threw a snowball at a police officer, and was charged with a felony and got arrested. Only in America would a police officer arrest a kid for being a kid.

It is interesting to think about the American values that the authors of this series are trying to portray. I began to notice a trend within this series. It seems as if these Americans were taking advantage of their power with self gain in mind, which shows the American value of the individual over community. It also shows people overreacting and taking seemingly harmless situations to an unreasonable level. In the eyes of many (specifically foreigners), the actions of American people (especially the government) seem ridiculous, and I think that this series is trying to show the American people how crazy some of the everyday occurrences that might go unnoticed really are.